Updates on Dad
(New updates will be on top)
WEDNESDAY, JUNE 7, 2023: 2:06 PM CST
I am so sorry I have not posted funeral arrangements on here.
SATURDAY, JUNE 3, 2023: 6:27 PM CST
Around 4:51pm, my daddy went to be with Jesus❤️🩹
I will share funeral arrangements when we know them. Thank you all for your love, support, and prayers.
SATURDAY, JUNE 3, 2023: 2:22 PM CST
We are an hour away from the hospital. Mark jr said the nurse said dad’s name really loud and he opened his eyes for a split second then closed them. I am praying he can hold on until I get there.
SATURDAY, JUNE 3, 2023: 12:07 PM CST
I am headed to Wichita now with my family. We kept waiting to hear from them (Wesley Medical) on if/when they would be transporting dad to Ulysses and they never would say so I stayed here in Ulysses. Now they’re telling me to hurry up there. His vitals have dramatically changed. I am just praying I can get up there in time. Please pray that we can have some moments with him all together before he goes to Jesus.
SATURDAY, JUNE 3, 2023: 8:55 AM CST
Maison called me at 3:50am…but it was not the normal scripted army call.
We had to make contact with the American Red Cross to notify them of an emergency so they could notify the military so they could let Maison know to call us. We filled out the request last night at 9:30 and by 3:50am (4:50 his time) maison was calling me. We had to let Maison know how my dad was doing.
We are waiting for them to remove dad’s drainage tube of his head, and we are praying that we can find a hospice that will accept dad. It’s the weekend and we are being told they can’t process him until Monday. Meanwhile, dad is getting worse and worse.
Our U-haul is here so we can get all packed up. Really not sure what is going to happen in the next few days.
We explained everything to maison and his drill sergeant told him he could keep his phone with him more today. He is still at reception and hasn’t started yet. I think the group that came in late had to start with a later group, but not sure. He sounded really good. Maison will make the decision on if he wants to come home or not.
I have no idea when they will be bringing dad home.
I have never felt pain like I do now. I am not ready to tell my daddy goodbye.
FRIDAY, JUNE 2, 2023: 9:43 CST
Not an update I want to make today.
Dad has been experiencing some stomach pain that led them to do a CT scan. They seen air in his bowels which means most likely there is a hole somewhere in there. For patients with this, they would do an exploratory surgery which is a massive incision where they go in and look around trying to find the hole or what’s causing the air.
If you don’t do anything about it, typically it gets worse and they get sepsis and the contents of their GI system will eventually leak out into the rest of their belly and they’ll get really sick and then they eventually pass away.
This kind of procedure is a very big procedure, has risks, and takes a long time to heal. It would be an extremely prolonged hospitalization afterwards, as well as the current brain infection he is fighting. This would delay treatment for his cancer substantially.
Having said that, his odds of treating his metastatic cancer is really low. It’s not curable. And now with everything else piled on top, you can’t start treatment and the cancer will continue to spread.
With this type of surgery he would be intubated for a few days, he’ll have to have a feeding tube for a prolonged period of time (due to the multiple issues he’s dealing with), a very long hospital stay, and he would quite possibly have a permanent colostomy bag.
They are confident they could do the surgery and find the hole, and patch it up. Their concern is what happens afterwards. He has a belly infection, brain infection, and cancer is spreading and eating away at his nutrition and resources. His odds of healing are very low and he’ll never be the same ever again.
So, at this point we have two options: do the surgery and deal with long extended hospital stay, feeding tube, being intubated for days, a permeant colostomy bag, extreme delay for cancer treatment which lets this aggressive cancer spread more…or go on hospice at home and try to keep him comfortable until he goes home to Jesus.
Our family has chosen to bring our dad home. Dad agrees he does not want the surgery.
We are exhausted and weary and I just don’t have much else to say, but I will tell you what is happening next.
They are planning to take dad’s drainage tube out of his head tomorrow and by tomorrow afternoon hopefully bringing him home to our local hospital so we can bring in hospice. We want to bring him home, but we don’t know who to call for that so for now we are just going to try and get him to our local hospital so we can all be together.
We have notified the Red Cross about my dad’s condition and they will notify the military and let Maison call us so we can tell him. He can decide if he wants to come home for a bit and start all over with basic, or stay there. We are devastated and heartbroken. Please continue to pray for our family.
FRIDAY, JUNE 2, 2023: 8:35 AM CST
Infectious Disease doctor told us dad’s spinal fluid tested for a bacteria called Enterobacter. It is a hospital acquired bacteria. So him having a surgery and an open wound made him susceptible to bacterias in the hospital and this is where he is at. He has been complaining a lot about stomach pain so they ordered a CT scan on his stomach to check it out.
THURSDAY, JUNE 1, 2023: 9:50 PM CST
I forgot to mention this in the last update. There is so many things happening I forget. They tested dad’s spinal fluid yesterday for meningitis. We don’t have results of that yet. Also, still no pathology results yet either. We know his brain tumor was cancer, but it was secondary. They sent tissue off to pathology and they are seeing what exact cancer it is and where it originated so they’ll know exactly how to treat it. Having said that, they won’t even THINK about treatment until he is 100% healed from his brain surgery. Chemo messes with wound healing so we can’t do any of that until the brain surgery incision is completely healed.
THURSDAY, JUNE 1, 2023: 7:20 PM CST
I didn’t get an update last night or today done, it’s been hard and heavy.
First, dad is still in ICU at Wesley Medical Center in Wichita. I went up Tuesday afternoon and came home Wednesday afternoon. (trying to make sure that’s right in my head…my days are blending together). Yesterday while I was there, they did clamp his drainage tube (which means they just shut the machine off basically) but the tube stays in his head to make sure everything is ok. They will watch for leakage for 48 hours and if there’s no leaking, they will remove the tube. They also said they would do another CT scan to check on everything and they did do that today. I haven’t heard the results on that yet. He will stay in ICU as long as that tube is in his head. We are BEYOND ready to move past this and see some light at the end of the tunnel. Dad went to the hospital 3 weeks ago yesterday. Mom and Mark jr have been in a hotel for 3 weeks. It’s a lot.
Maison finally made it to bootcamp! My heart hurts so bad, and that’s just the way it is for now. My mom is extremely sad about it. Grandma misses her grandson.
Adam and the kids are doing great in Bird City! Today they were putting on a new roof on our rental and finishing up electrical work and some work downstairs for Aniston. Milani is at the pool every day with her new friends and is basically living her life. She said she is beating all the boys at basketball and I’m not surprised haha! Aniston is almost done with his first week of drivers ed and hangs at the city pool with milani every day. They walk all over town, which takes them not long at all haha!
If I hear any more news on dad this evening I will post an update.
WEDNESDAY, MAY 31, 2023: 8:40 AM CST
Dad still has spinal fluid in his drainage bag but the nurse this morning said they may try to clamp the tube today. If/when they do that, they will observe to see if there is any leaking. If he doesn’t have any more leakage, they will take it out. I don’t feel like it’s time yet, but we’ll wait until dad’s neurosurgeon gets here.
Maison’s first flight yesterday had engine issues so they had to get off the plane and waited 7 hours for a new flight to Dallas. He is traveling with 3 other guys and he got them hotel figured out and shuttle to take him. They stood in a really long line to get new tickets figured out. He is super tired and was finally feeling really stressed last night. I am so proud of him! His flight today takes him straight to Columbia, South Carolina and the military will pick him up to take him to Fort Jackson.
Adam and the kids are in Bird City, living the life.
They got the yard mowed and Aniston had his first day of Drivers Ed. Adam has a 4 page paper due today so they are staying busy up there. I’m here in Wichita for the day and will head back home tonight to continue packing. Maison’s flight to Columbia is at 7:41pm so please pray for his travels to bootcamp.
As I hear updates today about dad I will keep you informed. Thank you everyone!
TUESDAY, MAY 30, 2023: 6:47 AM CST
Yesterday was a really hard day. My dad is in so much pain, my son left for bootcamp, and my husband and kids took a load to our new home (Bird City, Ks) because we’re moving this week. Yesterday was hard. I had to wait to get my tire fixed this morning before I can head out to Wichita and see dad. So I’ll be on the road today to see mom, dad, and mark jr, then turn right around and come back home so I can continue to pack.
Today, I am tired. We all are. Dad will continue to have the drainage tube until tomorrow I’m sure. He’ll remain in ICU while he has the tube in. When they decide to stop, they will cut it and observe. As long as there’s no leaking, they will pull the tube out.
Please pray for my dad. We are so ready to be out of this stage with his healing.
My son flies to South Carolina today and his new journey starts. My parents are simply devastated that they missed his gradation party, graduation and his graduation speech (he was the student speaker), and yesterday when his recruiter picked him up. My mom just sobbed on the phone to me yesterday. Their grand baby is gone and they just missed so much here towards the very end. This will make their “reunion” that much sweeter in December!!!
MONDAY, MAY 29, 2023: 8:07 AM CST
Nurse said dad threw up til 4 am and his dead is draining a lot of fluid.
This is what’s drained since they left last night. I’ll update as I hear from Mark jr.
(this update came through as I was typing the one below, so you might not have seen that one yet👇🏻)
MONDAY, MAY 29, 2023: 7:45 AM CST
Couldn’t sleep in like I needed to, so I am up typing away to distract myself haha!
Today feels really heavy. My son leaves this morning. My dad is in excruciating pain. And we start moving today to the big town of Bird City, Ks! (my husband is the new K-12 Principal there🥰)
This is one of those days that I need my mom and dad and brother here, because life is just not what we thought it was going to look like right now. If feels hard, painful, desperate, and just sad.
But…I have my entire family alive and breathing and that is a gift!
Seasons come and seasons go. There is so much wisdom to pick up along the way. There is miracles all around us if we look up to see them. The love of God is being shown in every person that sends a message or gives me a hug. I am so grateful for the love and support.
My dad is in a lot of pain. My brother sent me this text last night: “Dad’s in waaay more pain that the first one. Says it feels like someone is scraping his bone on top of his head. Just staring at us with watery eyes.”
It’s so hard to read that text and know I can’t be there. There’s nothing we can do for him except be there in presence and so when he opens his eyes he sees us. I am so ready for the days I can do updates with happy and exciting news.
Please pray for my dad’s healing, specifically that the leak has been STOPPED.
Please pray for my mom and brother with all their travels. They have been in a hotel for 3 weeks now (as of Wednesday) and it’s just hard to do this for a long period of time.
Please pray for my son as he leaves today with other soldiers on this Memorial Day to Amarillo where he meets up with more future soldiers and tomorrow they’ll be dropped off at the airport and sent on their way. Maison is heading to Fort Jackson, South Carolina for bootcamp and that will last 9 weeks 4 days.
Life really just feels hard right now. But God’s grace is sufficient. He is with us every day, every minute. I feel his presence reassure me when I want to panic and fall apart. It’s ok to be sad and grieve and wish things were different, and I for sure allow myself to feel all of that. I also know that this is the way it’s supposed to be…because this is the way it is. This is the curriculum God has given us OR allowed us to have. There is so much wisdom to pick up along the way and when this season is officially over, we will have so much gratitude for the present moment. God is good, all the time.
Thank you for loving my dad and praying for him.
SUNDAY, MAY 28, 2023: 3:22 PM CST
Mark sent me a picture of dad. It looks so painful and breaks my heart. This is going to be so painful when he wakes up. Please pray this fixes the spinal fluid leak. I feel like a broken record, but it’s all I can say except please pray for dad.
SUNDAY, MAY 28, 2023: 1:32 PM CST
Dad’s surgery went well. They put a tube at the site and will leave for 3 days or so and then they’ll take it out. It looks like a piece if IV tubing. It will let them drain out any fluid that builds up. When fluid build-up puts pressure on the incision, the more likely there will be leaking from the incision. He’ll stay in ICU as long as the tubes in. They anticipate they’ll leave the tube in for 3 days or so and by that time dad’s neurologist will be back on Wednesday and he can decide where we go from here. (the neurologist dad is seeing right now is not his usual one, and we’re grateful they are doing it today even though it’s a Sunday and a holiday weekend🙏🏻).
They put a brand new graft on the site and a good tight suture. He’ll be in recovery about an hour and a half and then he’ll go back to ICU again, where mom and mark jr will be able to see him.
I’ll continue to post updates. Please pray this fixes his spinal fluid leak and we can move on and see dad’s incision heal!🙏🏻
We had a great time at church today
SUNDAY, MAY 28, 2023: 8:20 AM CST
Well, dad’s surgery is this morning. I’m sure he is super hungry since he hasn’t been able to have breakfast yet haha. He hasn’t responded to any of my texts since Friday so I know he isn’t feeling well and is nervous. It’s hard to believe that it was three weeks ago today that he finally allowed me to take him to the hospital and that’s when they found his mass. And for three weeks before that he was deteriorating with his balance and motor skills. He’s 13 days post-surgery from the first time when they took out his tumor but it feels now that we’re back to square one since he will have to start the healing all over again. We are so ready for him to be better!
Today is our last Sunday with our church family and we were so blessed when they told us that they are having a potluck for us after church. We have a wonderful church family. Maison’s recruiter picks him up tomorrow at 10am so our hearts are for sure torn in so many different directions right now. We appreciate your prayers! I’ll update you all as the day goes and I hear from my brother.
SATURDAY, MAY 27, 2023: 12:12 PM CST
Dad is having surgery tomorrow at 9:30 AM. They said it should be a fairly simply procedure to patch up where the spinal fluid leak is. His symptoms lately have most likely been from the spinal fluid leak and not just the after-affects of his brain surgery. His imbalance and sluggishness *should* get better once they get this spinal fluid leak fixed.
“Cerebrospinal fluid (CSF) leak occurs when there is a tear or hole in the membranes surrounding the brain or spinal cord, allowing the clear fluid that surrounds and cushions those organs to escape.”
One of the symptoms of CSF is imbalance. Dad has been working really hard in therapy, but his left side is super “laggy” and he just is still really wobbly when trying to walk. If CSF is left untreated, you’re at risk for meningitis. I’m so thankful they are getting to this tomorrow and not waiting until Monday. With it being a long weekend I really thought they would wait. Thank you Jesus!
Mom and Mark jr won’t be coming home today like they had planned and will be missing Maison’s send off on Monday. All three of them missed Maison’s graduation party, graduation, and now his bootcamp send off…they are super bummed. Things just don’t look like we thought it was going to look like and I allow myself to hold both joy for the future and gratitude for every miracle along the way, and also my sadness and grief for the loss we’ve experienced. On Christ, the solid rock I stand. All other ground is sinking sand. My dad is right here he’s supposed to be, this is a journey God is allowing him to be on. My mom is experiencing what she is supposed to experience and even though this is dad’s surgery and healing, mom is also experiencing some God-chiseling herself. None of it is ever wasted. It’s all divine! Mark jr is taking care of them so well. I’m so proud of him for his patience, his ability to keep going and keep driving and keep taking care of mom. He’s been a great son to his parents and a great brother to me. I am so grateful for him!! I will keep you all updated.
FRIDAY, MAY 26, 2023: 8:19 PM CST
Dad’s MRI will be later tonight. I’m not sure who will be doing the reading so not sure how fast we’ll get results. He is in the Euro Trauma Specialty Unit. Mom and mark jr made it back to our second home, the hotel at the Kansas Star Casino haha. They have taken great care of us and allowed us to cancel rooms last minute if we need to! Will update you all tomorrow as soon as we have news about dad’s MRI and possible surgery.
FRIDAY, MAY 26, 2023: 5:55 PM CST
Dad made it smoothly back to Wichita in the ambulance. His room number is 4-105 (building 4, floor 10, room 5) at Wesley Medical Center. They are doing another MRI this evening and there is for sure a possibility for another surgery. I’ll keep you all updated. Mom and Mark Jr are with him now.
FRIDAY, MAY 26, 2023: 12:45 PM CST
Mark jr just called me and said dad’s doctor got a call back from the neurosurgeon and they are sending him back to Wichita immediately. They may have to do another surgery to get that spinal fluid under control. With it being a long weekend they didn’t want to chance it so they are sending him there now, and he might already be there. So mom and Mark jr are headed back to Wichita. They had planned to come home tomorrow morning to do some laundry, pick up mail, etc and also be here for when Maison’s recruiter picks him up Monday morning. Not sure what will happen now unfortunately. Please pray for my dad and my mom and brother. My dad is really upset at the thought of another surgery. It pains me to be away.
(don’t forget the update below, I typed them at the same time since I was out running errands in between both updates)
FRIDAY, MAY 26, 2023: 10:00 AM CST
I had an audio update from Dad’s doctor from yesterday evening my brother sent me this morning. Here is what she said:
Still no results from pathology. Dad’s doctor in Hutchinson said that the initial pathology results that said it is cancer, it also said it’s a high grade cancer, which means it’s an aggressive cancer. We’re still waiting on the additional testing to see where it originated from. She did say it is non-small cell. They won’t do ANY cancer treatment until he is healed from this brain surgery. Chemotherapy delays wound healing. It could be 6 weeks until he could even begin treatment. As soon as he has a discharge date with the rehab in Hutchinson, they will call his oncologist and setup a date to meet with them.
Dad’s balance is still off. He is able to walk unassisted with a walker, but getting up and sitting down is still really hard for him. He is sort of “neglecting” his left side and it’s not really in line with what he’s doing at the moment. His brain isn’t really paying attention to the left side. He makes jokes about it or makes light of it like “oh whatever” kind of thing. It’s all normal stuff, but it’s important to remind him “hey, this is your hand so make sure you use it” kind of thing. It’s like his brain is still trying to reconnect correctly. The goal is to get him to a level where family could leave to go run an errand and he could get up and use the restroom on his own if he needed to without falling. If we can’t get him there and it’s time for him to go home (insurance says we won’t pay for him to stay anymore) then they will do “caregiver training” for mom and mark so they can take care of him. With dad’s kind of brain injury he’s not going to even recognize he has a problem. We have to care for him and know what is too much care and when do you step back and let him do it as part of his rehab.
Cancer treatment usually makes your neurologic deficits…your balance and your thinking a little worse again. So if you already have balance issues or confusion, those tend to get worse with cancer treatment. So their goal is to build up his strength the best they can to prepare him for cancer treatment.
She said he would for sure be there in rehab through the weekend and that on Tuesday there is a team conference and they will hopefully have an approximate discharge date for dad.
She had put in a call to his neurosurgeon about the fluid leaking from his incision. Hoping to hear back soon.
My mom has been fearful of going out of town EVER. The first night my dad was in the hospital she laid in the corner chair almost immobilized with fear, not knowing where she was going to sleep (they wouldn’t let her stay another night in ICU of course) or how she would eat. She is severe celiac and leaving town to stay the night just doesn’t happen…hasn’t happened in probably 15 years. She has been in hotel now for 2 weeks in Wichita and Hutchinson, she eats out for every meal and has not got sick once! She now likes to stroll Target with her Starbucks and just yesterday bought a new purse! So proud of her for living her life in the midst of all this. Go mom!
THURSDAY, MAY 25, 2023: 4:42 PM CST
No word from the neurosurgeon, but the nurse said dad’s incision looked better today. Dad is doing a lot of PT. As soon as he wakes up they have him up in a chair.
He’s still not a fan lol.
WEDNESDAY, MAY 24, 2023: 6:23 PM CST
Mark just called me and said it was a little bit chaotic getting him admitted to the rehab clinic. Dad did some therapy with them and he wasn’t too fond of it all.
The nurse said she was concerned that there was some leakage from his incision but his neurosurgeon was gone for the day and so they had to leave a message. This is why we thought Wichita would be a better option for Dad in case something like this happened. We wanted Garden City so he would be closer, but with since he’s healing from brain surgery we thought Wichita would be better. So once they hear from the neurosurgeon we’ll find out more. It’s really hard to be here and not there with them to help.
WEDNESDAY, MAY 24, 2023: 2:55 PM CST
Dad is officially in rehab in Hutchinson! Mark Jr text me: “Weren’t even checked in yet and therapist grabbed him for 3 hours of pt.”
He is not too happy about it. I pray that he does what he needs to do so he can be better. I just want my dad back and have him healed so we can start the next chapter of his healing with the cancer. He has so much on his plate right now and I am sure his brain is still healing from the surgery. Please pray for him.
And please pray for his physical therapists lol. Mark Jr said there is 3 gals in there with him right now and “they ain’t playing any games” haha.
TUESDAY, MAY 23, 2023: 10:19 PM CST
Dad still hasn’t been moved to rehab yet. They work out insurance stuff first before they do that. Hoping they can tomorrow🙏🏻
TUESDAY, MAY 23, 2023: 2:29 PM CST
Just talked to my brother and he said dad looks about the same. He has been walking the hallways for his physical therapy. Wow! No news on transferring to rehab yet.
TUESDAY, MAY 23, 2023: 10:05 AM CST
Mom and Mark Jr headed back to Wichita this morning. Dad should be discharged and on his way to rehab today or tomorrow. We think it will be Hutchinson. Would love a miracle and to see Garden City open up!!
Lord, your will be done!
MONDAY, MAY 22, 2023: 2:45 PM CST
Got a call from dad’s case manager this morning that he’s ready to be discharged! They are working on getting him into a rehab place. Hoping for Garden City, but we might be forced to take Wichita. Garden City would have been such a help because driving to Wichita is a little tiring and 2 weeks in a hotel is a lot LOL.
But, ultimately we want dad where God wants him!!! I’ll keep you updated.
For those asking about sending him flowers, balloons, etc: I think let’s wait until he gets into his rehab place. I’ll share that address when I know it.
SUNDAY, MAY 21, 2023: 3:02 PM CST
No updates concerning Dad. We are still waiting for pathology to give us results and we are praying it’s soon. We are also hoping he gets to go to Garden City for rehab soon. He is really hesitant to do any movement unless it’s time for physical therapy and even then, he’s not happy about it.
If he can get that “want to” drive, his physical therapist said he will make so many strides in healing. With his condition, he’s afraid to do much walking because the last month he’s experienced so much imbalance and nausea that it’s worrying him. Hopefully, with every session in physical therapy he’ll start to trust the process. It’s too painful to move, but to work out that pain and soreness you have to move around. He’ll get there eventually.
We’re all headed home today. Mom and Mark Jr will head back tomorrow but I’ll be home to stay most likely. Mom and I have lots of phone calls to make and just things back at home we have to get back to. Maison ships out in 7 days and between the stress and emotions with my dad and also my son shipping out, I am feeling like a blubbering mess. It’s crazy how a week in Wichita is what feels normal now and going home feels so awkward. I hate leaving dad, and as I type this right now I have a lump in my throat. I would not wish this medical/health experience on anyone. There’s so many emotions and when trying to deal with real life at the same time, my goodness…but God is with us. He has a plan and we are to walk it out.
SATURDAY, MAY 20, 2023: 10:51 AM CST
Not much to update today. He is still experiencing pain (don’t blame him!) and sure wishes he could go home. Pathology doesn’t work on the weekends so we won’t hear from them until at least Monday.
We are all feeling the effects of being in hotel and ICU for over a week…so tired.
You always hear about people that had to go to Wichita for health things like this and think “ah man, that stinks!” But until you’re the one doing it, you don’t realize all the different things coming at you. Responsibilities at home you might be forgetting, your job, all the driving around, trying to find restaurants for everyone’s mood and dietary restrictions. Do you sleep in a little longer to get some rest and risk missing the doctor when he makes his rounds, or do you get up here super early and sleep sitting up in a chair.
Real life in the hospital. We spent a week in ICU and a couple days in a regular room. Mom skimming through the mail (Maison was able to go grab their mail…there was a lot!), dad sleeping, and mark jr zonked out in the chair. Having this room is better than being in ICU because Mark jr and I switched off every 2 hours since only two could be with dad.
My heart is forever changed when I hear of a family having to be taken to Wichita (or any big city) for a medical emergency. This is harder than I thought.
Having said that, we can’t thank you enough for all your prayers and checking in on us. It sure brightens our day!! I read every text dad gets to him and he loves it.
Prayer request: that dad can go ahead and be released to his rehab facility this weekend so we can be closer to home🙏🏻
FRIDAY, MAY 19, 2023: 2:34 PM CST
Life in the new hospital room is the “brand new” feeling all over again. New nurses, new rules, new places to park and maneuver through buildings, floors and hallways. But I am so grateful we all get to be together in the room at the same time.
Dad’s oncologist came in today to tell us there was still no results from pathology. They don’t work on the weekends so we for sure won’t hear anything until at least Monday.
My husband and kids will be here later this afternoon!
FRIDAY, MAY 19, 2023: 7:54 AM CST
We have some unfortunate news. The tumor they cut out and did a biopsy off, did in fact turn out to be cancer. But it didn’t start there. We are still waiting on pathology to figure out where it originated and then we go from there.
What this means is there was cancer somewhere else first and it metastasized and expanded into the brain. We don’t know anything else besides that right now.
Real big bummer.
We’ve known about this since Monday when he came right out of surgery, but wanted to wait and let him decide when/if we share with others. When pathology comes in with definite answers, we will share.
Please keep my family in your prayers. We have a very very long road ahead of us. Thank you🙏🏻
THURSDAY, MAY 18, 2023: 9:46 PM CST
Back at the hotel and by the time we eat and shower, we are exhausted😵💫 Great news this evening…dad was moved to a regular room!
This means we can all three be in dad’s room at the same time and there’s no time limit on visiting. My family comes tomorrow so that means grandpa and grandma get to see their grand babies!
THURSDAY, MAY 18, 2023: 4:40 PM CST
Shared with permission.
THURSDAY, MAY 18, 2023: 3:02 PM CST
Physical therapy was a little more intense. They had dad walking down the hall and doing some standing in his room. It gets a little tiring and dad starts to feel a little grumpy lol. We found out that when he is released from here (Wesley Medical Center in Wichita) he will go straight to rehabilitation (most likely Garden City, Ks). They estimate he would stay there for 2 weeks.
Mr. Bultman is not happy about that lol.
I would say that one week in the hospital to recover and two weeks of rehabilitation post brain surgery is pretty amazing! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Mom got to have Chick-fil-A for the very first time and she loved it! She has a very strict dietary restriction and has not ventured out of town much because of it, but 1-2 weeks in the hospital out of town has taught her she can go out of town and figure out what she can eat. Did I mention she LOVED Chick-fil-A? haha!
I am ready for my husband and kids to get here tomorrow!
THURSDAY, MAY 18, 2023: 10:07 AM CST
Goal for today: physical therapy will get him into the hallway walking a bit. They will give him nausea medicine before to keep him from getting motion sickness. He hasn’t been able to walk “normal” for a month now so he is super cautious about it. Get more protein in him and more eating overall. As soon as a bed is available downstairs that’s where we will go. It will be nice when all 3 of us can stay with dad all the time instead of mark jr and I rotating.
THURSDAY, MAY 18, 2023: 8:55 AM CST
Dad is resting a little better, but ICU is rough if you’re expecting sleep. He had a great nurse last night he said. He is still super apprehensive about eating much, since his nausea from pain meds has been so intense, but they really want him to get some protein in his system so today he’s going to work on that.
We were told they put the orders in this morning to move him to a regular room, but that just means they put the order in, doesn’t mean he will actually move today. Could be tomorrow.
My family is heading up tomorrow so my son Maison can see grandma and grandpa a little bit before he ships out to the Army. He leaves in 11 days and I am missing him this week so much. This is not how I envisioned my last month with my son before he left. God’s grace is sufficient!! Even if mom, dad, and my brother need to stay longer, I get to go home and be with my family. Maison leaves in 11 days and we are supposed to be moving soon after that. Life feels hard right now, but I remember harder times in my life. I refuse to allow the enemy try and convince me otherwise. This season really sucks, like really bad. But God is still with us like he is every other time! One day we will look back and remember “wow, that was a hard time. But we got through it.”
Mom is doing well, as she can be. She hates to see Dad like this. We are enjoying our morning coffee at the hotel before we head to the hospital. My brother Mark jr has been such a big help driving us all over. He says I’ve been snoring, but in my defense I only snore when I’m sick or when I’m super tired from stress🙃 We are ALL really really tired. Please pray we all stay healthy during this time. I’m sure our immune system has taken a hit. We want to be well for dad.
Pathology is still pending. Please pray for my dad🙏🏻
WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2023: 4:50 PM CST
Dad finally ate a whole cracker!!!! This is huge. He also was able to eat like 4 ice chips🙏🏻🙏🏻 He spends his days trying to rest but just keeps getting woke up by the “bells and whistles” as he calls them on his monitors and IV machines. This is what ICU sounds like dad🙃
The incision is at the back of his head, all the way down to his neck. It’s a pretty long incision. It’s very very sore. We’re trying to keep it iced up to reduce swelling.
WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2023: 1:50 PM CST
Dad had physical therapy today and did well. They had him do a bit of walking (has to be helped) and then he was supposed to sit in the chair for an hour instead of his bed. He did pretty good. Any sudden movements really set him into a nausea spiral. They are staying on top of the medicine for that thankfully and it’s not as intense.
He is super tired, but it’s hard to get sleep in ICU. Lots of rings and alarms going off which is annoying him big time. Nothing we can do about that of course.
WEDNESDAY, MAY 17: 2023: 8:48 AM CST
Dad was able to eat some applesauce, but he is so nervous he’ll get sick. So praying he does well.
WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2023: 7:53 AM CST
Dad is alert this morning, but is not getting much sleep. When we came in this morning they were giving him a sponge bath and it made him so sick. The doctor said his brain is rewiring and getting back to normal so it will level out day by day. His nausea is still causing a lot of vomiting when he takes his medicine so they are going to start a new med. When he gets sick it’s so much pressure on his head.
You always hear about people that have to go to Wichita for things like this and think “ah man, that is so sad”, but when it’s you, there’s a million things you’re juggling all at once. Thinking about the day-to-day things at home falling through the cracks, all the driving back and forth. We are all very tired.
TUESDAY, MAY 16, 2023: 5:35 PM CST
Dad is still in a lot of pain but when I just switched out so Mark Jr could go back in (only two are allowed at one time) he was asking for his fruit. PRAISE JESUS! He was finally able to eat some ice without throwing up so I am praying the fruit stays down as well. They are staying on top of the pain meds so hopefully he rests better tonight. His nurse said last night was really bad…he was in a LOT of pain.
Neurosurgeon just came in and told us the tumor came out great and things are looking great inside. Pathology is still pending. Please pray for my dad.
I forgot to mention last night that there are people that wait six months just to get into dad’s neurosurgeon. She basically was like “how in the world did you get into him?”
ALL GLORY TO GOD!!!!!
TUESDAY, MAY 16, 2023: 1:59 PM CST
Dad is experiencing intense pain and he’s throwing up from the pain meds. His head hurts really bad. The doctor said today’s goal is to maintain pain and vomiting. Pathology is still pending, but we need big big prayers please. Thank you. We ask that no one call or text him quite yet. We want him to sleep the best he can without interruptions. I will keep you all updated.
MONDAY, MAY 15, 2023: 6:43 PM CST
Dad is in recovery. We have not been able to see him yet. They said the tumor came out great. Pathology results are still pending.
MONDAY, MAY 15, 2023: 3:12 PM CST
They are about to take dad back. Please pray for my dad.
MONDAY, MAY 15, 2023: 12:29 PM CST
Just had a quick consult with the neurosurgeon, he is great. Went over the details once more time with dad and reassured him on the process. They are anticipating around 3:30. He says the surgery should last approximately 2 1/2 hours.
MONDAY, MAY 15, 2023: 11:24 AM CST
While mom and I are in the waiting room making some phone calls on our to do list, my brother text me that the nurse got Dad up standing and walking around. Dad basically stood up by himself for 5 mins and washed his hair. ummm WOW!!!
The steroids they have been giving him to address the swelling has made a massive improvement on his balance and fine motor skills, as well as his speech and right eye that had started to close. I hadn’t seen him since last Wednesday when I said goodbye on the ambulance so the change I am seeing is insanely drastic. I’m so sad I missed it actually LOL!
I am ready to see my dad healed and back to normal. Lord Jesus, you have my dad in your hands. We trust you and we thank you for every blessing. You have perfectly picked out his doctors and dates and we are so thankful.
I will update more later!
MONDAY, MAY 15, 2023: 9:26 AM CST
Dad’s nurse mentioned that his surgery is scheduled for 2:30 PM so that gives us an idea on what time we’re looking at. Of course it all depends on the first two surgeries and how well those go that will determine if we stay on schedule. We’re all super tired. Praying today goes smooth and tonight we can all sleep well. Dad is resting so good, taking little mini naps resting his eyes. He is very calm, but inside he is anxious. He’s asking lots of questions and is so worried about coming out of this and not remembering who his family is. The doctor remind him that he is going to be fine. I’ll update more later today.
MONDAY, MAY 15, 2023: 7:07 AM CST
Dad is 3rd in line to have surgery today. There is no set time so we are just waiting. For the very first time, the nurse won’t let us all 3 in to see Dad. It’s a new nurse. Every other head nurse has been so generous, which we’re grateful for. Dad was resting when we got in here and he is awake and alert. He is anxious as to be expected. I wonder if knowing an exact time would have made it worse. We just have to wait until our turn. I’ll post an update around 9:00 AM.
SUNDAY, MAY 14, 2023: 3:05 PM CST
Dad found out his surgery is for sure tomorrow morning (Monday). We do not have a set time, but just that he is the 3rd surgery of the day. That is all we know. The doctor’s name is Dr. Dickerson so please be praying over him that he would be alert and awake to take care of my dad. It is quite the extensive team that does this kind of surgery so prayers for them all tomorrow.
Dad is super anxious and nervous so please pray for him. He is REALLY ready for this to be done.
Lundon and I got on the road and should hopefully be arriving to Wichita around 6:00, just in time to see Dad a bit before ICU closes for the day. The ICU is letting me in with mom and mark jr even thought it’s supposed to be 2 guests only. THANK YOU JESUS!
SUNDAY, MAY 14, 2023: 9:40 AM CST
Sorry I did not get an update posted yesterday, but there wasn’t anything new to update. Dad is very nervous and anxious to get this surgery done. They are doing a CT scan every day (I think) to make sure the tumor and swelling isn’t changing. I sent him graduation pictures and videos yesterday and him and mom loved them. Thank goodness for technology! Maison was the student speaker and walked with all the ropes and high honors. Grandpa and Grandma are so proud!
Dad did take a good nap yesterday, even started snoring! I don’t know if he has snored in a while which his extremely unusual. He’s a very loud and consistent snorer lol!
Mark Jr has been doing a wonderful job taking care of Mom. She has to eat gluten free because of being having celiac, but she is seeing that her dietary restrictions aren’t that uncommon.
My oldest son, Lundon, is heading back to Kansas City today and said he would give me a ride to Wichita so we are heading out after church. I am grateful for his offer because I am super tired. The doctors had said the other day that Dad’s surgery should happen BY Monday, so if that still happens, I’m thinking we will be headed home Thursday-ish.
I will keep you all posted!
FRIDAY, MAY 12, 2023: 11:06 PM CST
No new updates are today. He sat in the chair all day instead of being in bed, seemed to like that better. I asked him how he felt when he was walking this morning and he said “better than expected.” Another day has come and gone and we are still grateful he has a bed and a neurosurgeon. Things feel calm right now, but I’m sure Sunday evening anxieties will start to rise.
Tomorrow morning is Maison’s graduation, so prayers for my parents and brother since they can’t be here. Dad is so bummed. Maison is the apple of his eye (along with the other grand kids of course) and it just hurts his heart to be gone. I sent a picture today of Maison in his cap and gown for the awards ceremony and my brother said mom started bawling.
It feels hard right now, but we know God is still in control and He is with us on this journey!
FRIDAY, MAY 12, 2023: 12:06 PM CST
The nurses got Dad up and walking this morning! He spends most of his time complaining about how loud it is in ICU. Lots of dings and alarms go off all the time on the machines. I think he thought if he complained about how noisy it is they would turn them off. Not gonna happen in ICU dad LOL.
Maison won the KSHAA Citizenship Award today at the graduation awards ceremony! We sure wish grandma, papa, and uncle mark could be here!
FRIDAY, MAY 12, 2023: 8:00 AM CST
Nothing new to update this morning. Dad is joking with me about the wonderful hospital food so in all this he hasn’t lost his humor lol. Maison’s graduation party is today so he is extremely bummed about missing that.
THURSDAY, MAY 11, 2023: 10:30 PM CST
Room info: Dad is at Wesley Medical Center in Wichita, Kansas. He is in room 7326, in the ICU.
THURSDAY, MAY 11, 2023: 6:10 PM CST
They just had a chat with the neurosurgeon. It is in fact a tumor on the cerebellum. The doctor said they will have the surgery by Monday. It sounds like they’re trying to rally the team to conduct the surgery but for sure by Monday it will be done. (Since tomorrow is Friday, I am assuming they won’t do it on the weekend.) They will take it out and should know by the time Dad wakes up if it’s benign or malignant. Whenever the surgery is, he will stay another 3 days approximately.
THURSDAY, MAY 11, 2023: 3:30 PM CST
I finally got to talk to Mom.
They did meet Dad’s Wichita doctor earlier today and they both really like him. They haven’t talked to the neurosurgeon yet. The doctor showed them all of Dad’s scans and see where the mass is. Tumors in this area you experience: dizziness, double vision, poor coordination, tiredness, unsteady walk.
Wow! That is Dad these last four weeks.
We have Maison’s graduation party tomorrow (Friday), graduation on Saturday, and we’re honoring our graduates at church on Sunday, so I plan on going up on Sunday after church.
Mom is struggling because of her dietary restrictions. And I’m sure the stress of all of this doesn’t help. I appreciate everyone’s prayers during this time. I will update more when I have more to share.
THURSDAY, MAY 11, 2023: 1:00 PM CST
Nothing new right now. They did another CT scan today. I didn’t hear about the results. Since Dad has eaten today the nurse did not suspect they would do any kind of surgery today.
THURSDAY, MAY 11, 2023: 12:30 PM CST
About 4 weeks ago, Dad started to experience some unsteadiness and imbalance. We went to the doctor once a week for 4 weeks and we had been suspecting side effects from his blood pressure medication. The doctor took him off the medicine but it didn’t make the imbalance go away.
In the last 2 weeks, my dad has progressed dramatically, especially the last 5 days. He is unable to walk, his speech is starting to slur, and his right eye sometimes seems like he can’t keep it open.
Last Sunday we did go to the hospital where they did a CT scan and told us there is a mass on his brain. They immediately scheduled an MRI. The MRI told us he has a cerebellar mass (I think this is on the cerebellum). He also has swelling on his 4th ventricle, and I think that’s in the same area as the cerebellum.
We were told by his local doctors the plan is to deal with the swelling first, then deal with the tumor.
Dad is currently in ICU in Wichita.
Mom was able to ride with him in the ambulance to Wichita and stay the night with him. He says he is “bummed and bored”.
My son Maison, my dad’s first grandson, graduates high school on Saturday and his graduation party is tomorrow (Friday). Maison also leaves for Army bootcamp on May 29th, so there are a lot of emotions. My family is moving away to Bird City, Ks where my husband will be the new Principal there, so my Dad is also super sad about that. March 4th was my grandpas funeral (my Dad’s dad) and shortly after that we learned another family member is experiencing some serious health issues as well. My dad feels like his world is falling apart.
We have a lot happening right now, but we know God is in control and we trust His plan. He has already blessed us with so much support.
The nurses in Ulysses have been the best. Specifically Teana Babcock-Heake, she is an angel from Heaven! Also Cheryl Duran and Ellen Garcia from the Ulysses ER.
A huge thank you to Critical Care Transfer for transporting my precious cargo, my mom and dad, to Wichita and giving me text updates so I could stay home and attend Baccalaureate with my family. My son sang 2 worship songs and had a little solo with the choir so being able to be there was so special to me. When I seen Debra and Kevin come in my dad’s room, my mom and I fell in their arms sobbing. Hometown people at best.
Thank you to my cousin Jodi Flores for picking up my brother at the airport when he flew in.
It takes a village and we are so grateful!
As of right now, I am home preparing for Maison graduation party tomorrow (Friday) and graduation on Saturday. My brother Mark Jr made it to Wichita this afternoon and finally got to see Dad. Mom is very tired, sore from taking care of Dad and of course super bummed she’s missing on all the graduation festivities.
Mom and I are super tired from the non-stop care Dad has needed and especially this last week. My dad is a very big man and getting him up and walking has been challenging. He feels so helpless and bad that he just can’t move like he wants to.
I ask that you please do not call or text Dad since he’s in ICU. I will post updates here to make it easier. I am truly blessed to hear how loved my dad is. I’ll update more later when I know more.